Do You Struggle with CTA?

It’s Christmastime again, and for millions of people, that means it’s time to get a Christmas Tree.  According to, about 27 million people bought fresh trees and 8.4 million people bought fake trees in 2010.  There are all sorts of information and ideas about trees, ornaments, lighting, and the like, but there is something that goes un-mentioned in the mainstream media:  Christmas-Tree Arrogance, or CTA.

CTA is a chronic illness, which rears its ugly head annually.  It’s kind of like the flu, but more contagious.  (Also, there’s less vomiting, hopefully).  Each year, when a family picks out, cuts, lights, and decorates their tree, CTA kicks in and makes them believe that their tree is the best tree IN THE WORLD.

This disease is tragic, and can lead to more harmful diseases like pride, snobbishness, and in some cases, narcissism.  If you think you may suffer from CTA, here is a quick and easy treatment plan:

  1. Take a deep breath, in through your nose and out through your mouth.
  2. Repeat this phrase 3 times: “I do not have the best looking tree on the planet.”
  3. Feast your eyes on this:
9’6″ Cedar with 1100 lights.  OWNED.

Fact is, you can’t have the best Christmas tree.  Why not?  Because we do.  Sorry!  Hope that helps your CTA!

Posted in Bonus Post